Two Trifles

Last night, I had this crazy dream in which I was on Saturday Night Live. Incidentally, I was not a main cast member, but one of those comedians who get relegated to the back of a scene while an Amy Poehler-type shines. So sad.

Earlier in the day, I had been on the set of Conan O'Brien (I don't know why) and there had been an explosion. Not an comedy explosion, but an honest-to-God fiery explosion with heat and smoke and flying glass. Needless to say, it traumatic. Conan suggested I take Saturday off.

Dedicated to my job, I went to work with the intention of performing on Saturday. But it was hard to function. So I asked Lorne Michaels -- who was not actually Lorne Michaels but the character Danny Tripp -- if I was in any scenes on Saturday. Brusquely, he said, "No."

So, I asked for Saturday off. And Tripp turned on me, telling me that I had to come in because even if there weren't scenes for me to be in, it was important I was on set to watch children and tend to chickens.

I burst into tears, because a) I was singed by an explosion earlier in the day, and that was stressful, and b) my asshole boss was essentially telling me my dream of being a comedian was fruitless but hey, I could always be a chicken herder.

Then Danny Tripp fired me.




At least in my waking life, I'm successful at making dessert. This lime-berry trifle is delicious: light, tangy, sweety, fruity. Oh, and it's incredibly simple to make.

Suck on that, Danny Tripp. You can't have any, but Conan is welcome to the entire thing.


Lime Berry Trifle
(adapted from The Pampered Chef's "Spring/Summer 2007 Season's Best Recipe Collection")

3 limes, washed
6 oz cream or nuefatchel cheese, softened
2/3 cup sweetened condensed milk (regular or fat free)
12 oz whipped topping (regular or reduced-fat)
1 qt. assorted fresh berries, washed and cut up, if needed
1 large, prepared pound cake or angel food cake

In a large mixing bowl, zest 1 lime. Squeeze the juice of 2 limes (including the zested lime) into the bowl. Cut remaining lime in half and slice one half into thin rounds; set lime rounds and untouched half aside.

Add cream/neufatchel cheese and condensed milk to the bowl; whisk to combine. Gently fold 2/3s of the whipped topping into the lime mixture until smooth. Taste; if needed, add more lime juice from reserved lime half.

Cut cake into 1-inch cubes. To assemble trifle, place half of the cake cubes into the bottom of a trifle bowl or other attractive clear bowl. Top with half the lime mixture and half of the berries. Arrange lime slices against inside of bowl to garnish. Repeat layers once more with remaining cake cubes, lime mixture, and berries.

Using the reserved whipped topping, cover the top layer of berries, smoothing as best as possible. If desired, use a pastry bag with a star tip and/or extra berries and lime slices for additional garnish.